How to Write Your Novel's Hook

by C. Patrick Schulze

Listen to a PODCAST of this article.

We've all heard how important it is to begin your NOVEL with an effective hook. The reason, of course, is your novel's hook helps potential readers make many of their decision about your book. Be it AGENTS, publishers or readers, everyone seeks out these first few words and these lines make a lasting impression.

When I focused on that first paragraph, I spent a great deal of time to research how to write my novel's hook and I thought I'd pass along some of the better tips I found.

By the way, I just made up these hooks as I wrote this article, so cut me some slack if they're not up to par, okay? After all, there's just examples.

1. You may craft an opening that sets a mood. This is the method I employed in "Born to be Brothers" when I wrote, "Something was about to die."

2. One alternative is to pique the reader's curiosity. "I always wondered how it felt to die."

3. You might pen a line that compares two things not normally associated with each other. "Jackson couldn't decide if he should go to his father's wedding or his mother's funeral."

4. You can have your main character perform an action. "He mumbled to himself as he lifted the pocket watch from the dead man's vest."

5. You may wish to indicate something is about to change in a radical fashion. "I felt my body grow lighter as it began to blend with the fog."

6. Why not begin with an intriguing person or place. "The countryside looked as if an artist had painted his fondest vision."

7. One choice is to have a character speak about an unusual situation. "Yep, I seen it all. It exploded and blew that guy to kingdom come."

8. Another option is to offer your reader something unexpected. "The aircraft crashed into the ground with a fiery explosion. Then the pilot stepped out and dusted himself off as if it was all in a day's efforts."

9. You might open your novel with dialogue. "Are you ready to tell me about it now?"

10. Yet another opportunity lies within immediate conflict. "She knew she'd get in trouble even as she clinched her fist." I'm working on my next novel and this is how it starts, at least in the first draft.

11. A strong hook can begin with an emotion. "I hated that man from the moment I met him."

12. Yet another opening hook might be to offer your reader a puzzle. "I wondered how could a human being shrink so much in one night?"

13. Have you ever thought to startle your reader? How's this? "I never knew humans tasted like chicken."

Of course, there are any number of other methods by which to create your novel's hook, and you can even combine two or three of these ideas for maximum effect. Regardless, your goal is to draw your reader into the story and you've got only one chance to do so. Best of luck with it.

Now, does anyone have a hook they'd like to share with our readers?

I hope by now you know, I wish for you only best-sellers.

C. Patrick Schulze

Author of now-at-the-editors novel "Born to be Brothers"

How to Write Humor - or Not

by C. Patrick Schulze 

Listen to a four-minute PODCAST of this article. 

At my writers' group not too long ago, I brought a chapter from my current manuscript for everyone to critique. I wrote that specific chapter to introduce levity into a serious situation, comic relief and all that. 

The women at the table read with furrowed brows and penned their critiques in their continual and honest attempts to help. However, the one other guy at the table began to read, put his pen down and howled out loud. He guffawed until after he finished reading.

Now I wished for the humor of the scene to come through, but I wanted the women to enjoy it too. To say they did not, is quite the understatement. The guy thought it "great," whereas not a single woman so much as snickered. Why?

I had come face-to-face with the realities of writing humor. It's tough.

One difficulty we as writers face lies in the fact most of the tools of humor are lost to us. We don't have the advantage of props, facial expressions, tone of voice, foul or unusual noises, and of course, body language.

Another issue with writing humor is it's subjective. What's humorous to one is insipid to another. Further, one's sense of humor is steeped in their upbringing, their experiences and so many other personal aspects of their life.

Also, when writing novels you have a different storyline in play. This storyline, or plot, is often what distracts from the humor and vice-versa.

So, as authors, what can we do to improve our humorous writing?

First of all, believe truth is much funnier than fiction, so look at life. I have a life-long friend who is writing a novel about being a left-handed, only child.

The secret to overcome the subjective aspect to humor is to write about those universal truths in which all humans find levity.

Don't try to write a humorous novel, write a novel with humorous events.

Understand that humor is imprecise. You should, therefore, choose your words with care and take advantage of your thesaurus. Though humor can be defined by both "absurdity" or "wit," the difference between those two words can evoke a wide range of readers' emotions.

Try to surprise your reader. Few things create more humor than a fun shock. The fact the unexpected causes people to laugh is so common a phenomena it has a name. It's called the Incongruity Theory.

Humor, if effective, can improve the flow or pace of your novel and can even make it more memorable.

Become a thief. Yes, the best humor may just lie in the hands of others. Steal it and use it. Oh, yeah, and paraphrase.

Now here's a clue from the famous comedian Dave Barry. He says he uses the funniest sentence at the end of his paragraph and his funniest word at the end of the sentence.

The final secret relative to writing humor I'd like to pass along to everyone is this: Humor is not found in the writing of it. It's found in the editing of it. (I know you didn't want to hear that, did you?)

Now, here are some pitfalls to keep in mind.

Refrain from those jokes the demean others. With every one you write, you lose an entire segment of your audience.

Be certain your humor doesn't detract from the story.

It's far better to leave the humor out than to have a poorly received novel.

Shy away from physical humor. Why? Because your reader can't see it. This also applies to jokes related to the size of things, especially if your audience is male.

Your characters should not break into fits of laughter. It may appear the author finds his own jokes funny.

Does anyone care to share any humorous events they've experienced with writing humor?

Until we meet again, know I wish for you only best-sellers.

C. Patrick Schulze

Author of the emerging novel, "Born to be Brothers"

How to Write Imagery

by C. Patrick Schulze.

Listen to a PODCAST of this article.

Welcome back, everyone. It’s nice to have you here again.

We, as fiction writers, have an obligation to take our readers to unknown and interesting places within worlds they would or could never imagine. And imagery is that tool we use to take them there. How to write imagery? It’s not as difficult as you might think, and today I’ll offer some tips and techniques on how to write imagery that I hope you’ll find useful.

Imagery is defined by Dictionary.com in part as, “the formation of mental images.” Imagery is all about painting the proverbial mental picture.

Imagery can be one of the most important aspects of your novel. Let’s look a simple example, shall we? What type of picture do you see when I mention rain? Now think about rain that races sideways, propelled by a howling wind. Both pictures typify rain, but the second is much more powerful, don’t you think? These powerful pictures are what you seek with your imagery, for they will engross your readers in your story.

A common error among aspiring writers is they describe their setting as they might a photograph. The average writer just writes the various things he sees. This method tends to offer a dry, formulaic image, bog down the story and dampen a reader’s enthusiasm.

Instead, an author may attempt to write in a way that incorporates his images into his character’s actions. This next example, typifies how a writer might do this.

"He strode into the stone building and noted the poor quality of the landscape. Once inside, he wondered as to the purpose for the narrow windows which allowed little light to enter the rooms."

Now, here are some general tips on how to write imagery into your novel.

1. Paint your verbal pictures in nibbles more than great gulps of information.

2. A rule of thumb says to put no more than three sentences together when describing your scene.

3. Use your characters’ senses. Here’s your example.

He tiptoed farther in and noticed an odor waft up from beneath the floorboards.

4. Pepper your dialogue with imagery. That is to say you might allow your characters to impart images of things that happen when they speak. “I can’t seem to stop these goose bumps from rising, no matter what I do.”

5. Use strong verbs that convey action. Words such as twirled, jumped, scurried or plotted exemplify mental pictures by their nature.

6. If you can find a way to use ordinary things in other than ordinary ways, your imagery will come alive. What if you wrote about an automobile that pulled a tow truck or a short kid who is able to spike in volleyball? These seeming contradictions will ensure your imagery jumps off the page and into your reader’s memory.

7. Think small. Have your characters take note of the smallest details in your setting. Could you make use of the tiny nubs on the treads of a new tire? When might you point out the indentation at the bottom of a wine bottle? Can you employ the scratches on a cell phone screen in your novel?

8. Similes and metaphors are powerful tools to enhance your imagery. In my current novel, one character has hair as gray as a coming storm.

9. Personification is a useful tool when you create imagery in your novel. That is, give human-like qualities to something nonhuman. Here’s an example. “The breeze whispered through the woods.”

10. Not all of your imagery need be of the beautiful. In fact, readers will often appreciate just the opposite. In my second novel, the character all my female readers liked the most was the tall, chiseled hunk who fell for the dumpy farmer’s daughter. Without variation, they said they liked him for his love of the unattractive woman, not his good looks.

Do any of you have other examples as to how a novel writer might employ more compelling imagery? I’d appreciate your suggestions.

As always, know I wish for you only best-sellers.

C. Patrick Schulze

Author of the emerging novel, “Born to be brothers”

How to Write Conflict into Your Novel

by. C. Patrick Schulze

Listen to a PODCAST of this Article.

Welcome back, my friends. It’s nice to see you again.

Conflict is critical to any good story. In fact, it makes your story worth reading and is the key component that weaves all the elements of your novel together.

The secret to CONFLICT is found when tension builds between two opposing forces then explodes. To translate that to your characters, conflict rests within the moral choices they make when placed in unusual situations.

Think of it this way. A daughter tells her father a lie, but the father could not care less. Where is the excitement? Where is the energy? Where is the conflict? The conflict is found within the father’s reaction to the lie, not within the lie itself. Now imagine this scene if the father gets angry about it and slaps his daughter. The lie builds the tension and the slap explodes it. All of a sudden, we’ve got a much more interesting event, don’t we?

Now for some general tips on how to write conflict into your novel.

Conflict begins and ends with desire. In your storyline, have your hero want something or someone he can’t have unless he completes some great struggle.

Too much conflict, or too little, will distance your reader. This is a delicate balance to achieve, but you can’t bore your reader with too little conflict or exhaust him with too much.

Two major points of conflict will most often carry your novel. One internal and one external conflict point is all you need. For example, a hero’s lack of confidence might be the internal conflict, whereas his need to save the girl from the dastardly Dr. Dowrong might exemplify the external conflict.

Use conflict to vary the pace of your novel. Think of a graph where you have an upward trending line that looks like a mountain range that always grows to the right. Can you see those peaks and valleys? That line represents the pace of your novel and the peaks represent your major conflict points or those times of greatest conflict. You get a peak at every serious point of conflict and a valley whenever your hero solves that specific issue. He then faces another peak and so on until he reaches his major confrontation with the big bad wolf.

Every CHAPTER in your novel should have someone wanting something. To say this another way, every chapter requires conflict. This may be as simple as a young girl who wishes her mother would allow her to walk to school, to the reactions of your hero as he is thrust into battle.

The essence of growing conflict, and thus tension, is choice. Your HERO must be forced to make choices to keep him moving forward on his quest. If you also offer your protagonist conflicting alternatives, it keeps your tension at a higher plane.

Your conflict must have a final goal in mind and that goal is most often the growth of your hero. This evolution can be emotional, physical or any other “-al” you wish, but the purpose of all this running around is to, in the end, have your protagonist come out a better person.

End each chapter of your novel with a cliffhanger, or conflict that is about to peak. This need not be as grand as your hero’s pending death, but leave a question in the readers’ mind. They’ll want to know more.

Fear intensifies conflict. Your hero must face his fears, so include fright at judicious points within your manuscript.

Use DIALOGUE as a major tool to build your conflict. If used effectively, dialogue increases the emotion, the tension and tragedy.

Are there any aspects to conflict about which you’d like to hear more?

Until my next post, you know I wish for you only best-sellers.

C. Patrick Schulze

Author of the emerging novel, "Born to be Brothers"

Ten More Tips on How to Write Your Novel

by C. Patrick Schulze

Listen to a PODCAST of this article.

Welcome back. It’s nice to have you visit again. In today’s post, I’ll piggyback off of yesterday’s Ten Tips on How to Write a Novel with ten more all-purpose tips. Hope you find something here you can use.

Here are the first Ten Tips on How to Write a Novel.

Let’s pick up with number 11.

Keep your attitudes in check. This relates to the classic issues of “show vs. tell.” If you tell your reader the forest is ominous, that’s your opinion. What if your reader finds your ominous is his exhilarating? Your goal is to allow them to make up their own mind by offering them setting rather than sets. If you must offer an opinionated word or two, it works better if you use them within your dialogue.

12. Readers enjoy a good riddle, so give it to them. If you can work in a bit of mystery into your story, all the better.

13. Watch your speech tags. Most recommend you shy away from the classic error of substituting actions for the word, “said.” If you must use a word other than “said,” it’s best to use them in a preceding or following sentence. Here’s an example:

     Jane sighed and responded, “If I must.”
     It should read, 
     “Jane sighed when she responded. “If I must.”

14. Effect never comes before cause. When writing sentences, your best option is to place your active noun first, follow this with the action that occurs and then the effect of the action. Your victim doesn’t die before the murderer fires the gun and people recommend your sentence structure should mimic this concept.

15. Write with specificity. Now there’s a good word. By this I mean to get away from all the weak words we all use. Generally, Most often, these words end in “ly.” However, you might also find those pesky three-word phrases that need paring. You know what I mean, all those, “long, hot nights” or the “hard, packed ground” entries.

16. Write with conciseness. Rather, write with simple words and not with words like “conciseness.” Also, search out and eliminate phrases that can be replaced by single words. An example is, “due to the fact” might become “because.”

17. The pace of your novel is important. Imagine a car chase at three miles per hour. Sort of loses something, doesn’t it? Short choppy sentences speed up your writing, while long sentences slow it down. The same holds true for paragraphs and even chapters.

18. Suspense is super. Imagine your hero rushes in to diffuse the bomb. He grits he teeth as he glances at the timer. It says he’s got forty-seven days. Puff. There goes your suspense. Ticking clocks, proverbial or otherwise, help to build suspense.

19. The primary tools you have available to build characters are details, mannerisms and dialogue.

20. Good scenes need good structure. Chapters fill in well when they have three scenes, all of which should move your story toward its conclusion. Each scene requires conflict and an outcome of that conflict. Scenes also either resolve conflict or advance it.

Now, which of these ideas would you like fleshed out?

Are these suggestions everything you need to craft a well-writing novel? Nope. But they’re good start. Best of luck.

As always, you know I wish for you only best-sellers.

C. Patrick Schulze

Author of the emerging novel, “Born to be Brothers”

10 Tips on How to Improve Your Writing

by C. Patrick Schulze

Listen to a PODCAST of this article.

Nice to have you visit again.

I am in the middle of wrestling my manuscript to the ground and find I learn something new every day. With that in mind, I thought I might offer all my writer friends some general writing tips on how to improve your writing. Outside of the first tip, these aren’t offered in any specific order other than what came to mind at the time.

Let’s begin with what I think is the secret to success as a writer: persistence. As a father, the mantra I imposed upon my poor daughters was, “Practice, practice, practice.” (Though grown, they still make fun of me about that one.) In any case, as with every profession, the more you do it the better you become.

2. Invade your readers’ senses. This means when writing you find opportunities to have your characters use their five, or as some say, twelve, senses. When your characters smell the honeysuckle, so do your readers.

3. Diamond’s are not a girl’s best friend. Well, I think it was Marilyn Monroe who informed all men that diamonds are indeed a girl’s best friend, but for women writers, (and their male counterparts), it’s verbs. The strength and exactness of the verbs you choose is the most powerful tool you possess to elevate your writing. The best verbs bring emotions or pictures to your readers’ minds.

4. Create interactive settings. That is, write in such a way as to have your setting come alive. The first time I took my writing to my critique group, every person mentioned a visual I had in my story. They commented on a scene where a boy reached up to grab his father’s shotgun from over the mantel and I wrote about the glow from the fire as it warmed the boy’s legs. It is those inconsequential images that paint those all important and powerful word pictures that immerse readers into your story.

5. Backstory belongs in the back. When I learned how to write backstory into my novel, I had to rewrite large chunks of what I already had on paper. Those long-winded paragraphs about what happened before my character came into my story became short, concise inserts within the story.

6. Bodies have language, too. Think of a person who has received astonishing news. What might they do at that time? Inhale? Shriek? Curl a lip? So might your characters. And best of all, readers love characters’ body language.

7. Conflict is king. Conflict is much like a drug drip in a hospital. That happy little bottle always hangs around and you get to dial it up whenever you want to. Conflict, not action mind you, but conflict is the power behind your novel.

8. If conflict is king, characterization is queen. Every novel rises and falls on the backs of those people who populate your novels. Effective characterization is a difficult skill to master but when you do, even you’ll fall for your books.

9. Knowledge is power. By this I mean, your writing has more strength if you give your readers the knowledge they require. It’s more interesting if your characters know the bomb is about to explode as this creates tension in your reader’s mind. As Alfred Hitchcock said, "There is no terror in a bang, only in the anticipation of it."

10. Give ‘em what they want. Your readers read for a reason and as a writer you should know that reason and cater to it. The lesson here is to learn your market. Write to satisfy your readers’ needs and not your own.

What tips might you like to share with my readers?

As always, know I wish for you only best -sellers.

C. Patrick Schulze

Author of the emerging novel, “Born to be Brothers"

How to Write Scenes in a Novel

by C. Patrick Schulze

Listen to a PODCAST of this article.

Great! You’ve developed these wonderful characters who stand primed to flit about your magnificent setting and, boy-oh-boy, do you ever have an idea for a storyline. Well, it’s all for naught if you can’t compile these things into scenes and string those scenes together to make your story awe your readers.

Imagine, if you will, a lustrous string of pearls. The first gemstone compliments the next, which balances with the rest. Strung together they lay upon a woman’s neckline to bring forth her natural beauty and give her a radiating sense of elegance. Now imagine that necklace where the jewels are a hodgepodge of odd sizes, hues, luster and even quality. All of a sudden we’ve taken the best of nature and the best of man to make them into something less than pleasing. The same thing happens with your story if you don’t pay as much attention to your scenes as you did with your characters and setting.

Let’s get started.

To begin, you may wish to know some people recommend you consider what the characters want to happen, what they need. Personally, I disagree. I believe if you first determine where you want to go and what steps you must take to get there, your characters will follow.

It’s important to know an effective scene requires emotion, action, dialogue, characters, conflict and setting. Of course, it’s primary component is the conflict your characters face.

Next, determine what has to happen in a scene to move this part of the story forward. Don’t worry about what could happen or what should happen. Be concerned only about what MUST happen. Now that you know what must happen, figure out who must be in the scene to make it work. Put only those characters into it and leave out everybody else.

At this time, use only two or three sentences to write your scene. That’s all you need at first.

Next you determine where this scene takes place. It may be obvious after you asked yourself what must happen, but if it isn’t, fix the setting into your mind. Consider that events happen in places one might think out of place. Think of a teacher and high-school student as they discuss the child’s grades. You’d assume this would happen in the classroom, most likely after class, right? Why not have this discussion take place at a racetrack or better yet a bar. Now that would perk the scene up, don’t you think?

Now consider how it all ties together. A classic secret is to begin as late in the scene as possible. Regardless, this next beginning almost calls out for recognition as it naturally piggybacks off the ending of the previous scene. However, give this a bit of thought, too, and see if you can’t punch up your creativity just a bit. For example, your student and his teacher are talking at the races when one scene ends. The next scene might typically start the following day in class. What if this second scene started as they watch the school burn down? The oddity of your settings may just give your novel a unique and imaginative spark. After all, why should all the surprises come at the end of a story?

The next thing you might want to do is visualize your scene as if it were in a movie. If you can see there, it’s probably got some strength to it.

After all this, now’s the time to pen what many call a scribble draft. It doesn’t have dialogue, setting or anything beyond simple physical actions. Make is a bare-bones outline. It’ll sound something like this:

     Jack runs down the hill

     Jill runs after him.

     Jack falls down the hill, and drops his bucket.

     Jill does too and screams as she tumbles.

     Both land in a heap at the bottom of hill.

After all that, now guess what you get to do? Yep, first draft. It time to put fingers to keyboards and clack away.

You may find it useful to write your scene first with only the characters’ physical actions and nothing more. When you close your eyes and “watch” your scene take place, look for those areas that stutter or slow the pace. Those are the parts that need work. After you’ve “seen” it play out, go through this process again, this time with the dialogue. Does it “hear” as well, too? If not, you know what needs work. Do this a third time with your setting in mind and you’re good to go.

The real secret to a good scene is visualization.

After you string a few scenes together, reread them and ask what’s the worst that could happen if this scene or that were omitted in whole. If the basic storyline is unaffected by the missing scene, it’s unnecessary and should probably be cut from your manuscript. 

Yep, it’s a lot of work, but you’ll get that beast wrestled to the ground and your story will emerge. Good luck.

Here’s a couple tips many find useful. Write your last scene first and the first scene second, at least in outline form. If you know where you need to go, the steps to get there will become much more obvious.

If you remember, I recommended you first write out your scenes in just two and three sentences. If you do, put all these mini-scenes on the same piece of paper, a file of its own. Make a copy of that document before you expand them into full scenes. This is the start of your synopsis. (You’ll thank me one day for this tip!)

Until we speak again, I wish for you only best-sellers.

C. Patrick Schulze

Author of the emerging novel, “Born to be Brothers”

FREE ebooklet - How to Write a Novel

Follow this link to download my FREE ebooklet, How to Write a Novel.

http://bit.ly/aLPSFc

I'd appreicate any feedback.

Patrick

How to Write Battle Scenes

How to Write Battle Scenes

By C. Patrick Schulze

Listen to a podcast of this article here.

There are two basic types of battle scenes. There is the one where an individual combatant engages in a fight. There are also those epics where generals maneuver grand armies over the countryside. Though both of these scene types have great similarities when it come to your writing, today we’ll discuss a scene in which one or a few soldiers is involved.

Battle scenes are unlike other scene types as they have a trickier side to them. They utilize a different construction and fewer words to move them forward. These scenes are all about speed, strength and emotion.

However, as with any scene, it must have meaning to the story and move the storyline further toward its conclusion. Does the battle offer a plot twist perhaps? Does it help the hero grow? Might it enlighten your reader to more of your hero’s personality? Like all writing, these scenes should also utilize your characters’ five senses. And don’t forget about point of view either. It is as critical in battle scenes as any other. For example, how effective would an ambush be if the hero knows it was about to occur? Of course, this part of your novel must be well-written, punctuated with accuracy and all those other things novels require.

Write only about the action and trim out everything not related to the moment in time. In battle scenes you’ll employ fewer words than with your normal writing. Adverbs will become quite scarce as will adjectives. Also, search out specific nouns and verbs. You’ll find great command over your words if you choose that unique verb or noun for the situation at hand. For example, soldiers don’t “run” across a field, they “charge” or “rush” or “dash” across it.

The use of emotion is THE component you need to emphasize in writing battle scenes and you should employ all your powers of persuasion at this time. Though James Bond or Patton may be your exceptions, your characters are not indifferent to combat. Even your heroes will be utterly terrified. And consider the emotions of those at the home front. If you fail to bring their feelings into play, you’re missing a powerful plot point.

One powerful tool at your disposal is sentence structure. Your sentences should imitate a sword fight; furious, short and brutal. Long passages slow down the novel, whereas short, choppy ones increase the pace.

Dialogue is another tool that can enhance, or destroy, your action scenes. First of all, you should work for a bit of realism here, so please, no snappy comebacks. Keep your characters’ dialogue to the point. When a soldier is under fire, he’s not joking to his buddies about a YouTube video he saw last night. Nothing is on his mind other than the events swirling around him.

Now for some general tips.

Remember, this is a novel, not a flicker show. Though the slashing sword is important, the character’s reaction to that event is more so.

Insure your villain is worthy. Nobody’s impressed when your hero fights a challenger who is without adequate weaponry.

Don’t write about David and Goliath. That one’s been done.

Whether writing fiction or nonfiction, large battles or single combat, draw a map of your battlefield. It need not be of high quality, but you’ll be surprised as to how much this can help. Use photos of sites whenever possible. I travel to the actual battlefield where my combat occurs and take photos. I then place them on my screen when I write my battle scenes and refer to them often. You’ll be amazed how something as slight as a slight rise in topography can come into play in this type of writing.

When men are wounded, only four thoughts crowd their minds; what parts are missing, will they die, water and family, not necessarily in that order.

In a fight, if someone receives a minor wound, he doesn’t stop to look at it, touch it and study the blood on his fingertips, show it to his enemy and scowl, step back, retake a fighting stance and egg on his opponent with a flip of his fingers. The instant he looks down, he’s dead. That’s it. Keep it moving.

Adrenalin and panic can overcome only so much. Minor injuries won’t be noticed, more serious injuries will stun a combatant, if stop him. Characters run out of breath, they bruise, they bleed. Write to the realism. 

Well, I could go on and on about this as battle scenes are my forte, but for the sake of word count, I’ll stop. I do hope you’ve picked up something of use to you.

You know by now I wish you only best-sellers.

C. Patrick Schulze

Author of the emerging novel, “Born to be Brothers.”

When is Too Much Sex, Too Much?

Listen to a podcast of this article HERE.

One of my blog readers asked me to expand on an earlier article, “How to Write a Sex Scene,” and today I’ll try and help her out. Her question entailed how much detail should one write into a sex scene. In my mind it’s up to the writer, but the answer varies according to writer’s target audience and the needs of the scene. Regardless, the reader’s imagination is the determining point.

Let’s look at the scene first. If you’re writing about raw sex, you might wish for more detail. Should you write about the power of love, you’d likely incorporate less. In the first case, you might include the feel of a woman’s wetness, whereas in the second you might offer nothing more than a bit of caressing as the two disappear behind a door. 

Think also about the scene’s perspective. Is it written from the eyes of an eighteen year-old male bully or from grandma’s? Imagine how the bully might envision sex in relation to how might your grandmother. (Sorry for that visual.)

Let’s now take a look at the target market. Imagine how “the first time” scene might change if you wrote about seventeen year olds, thirty-somethings or grandmothers. In the first, you might have a young boy’s initial experience which entails raw sex with much more physical and tactile detail. The second could be a woman’s first encounter since her oppressive divorce where the details revolve less on the physical than the emotional. Grandma’s first encounter since her husband died might have very little detail, (if you don’t mind…), and convey something like comfort or even betrayal. Each displays the same basic scene, but with wildly varying descriptions and need for detail. 

Here is how I feel about the subject in general. It’s all about the reader’s imagination. 

Consider this simple example of describing a woman’s eyes when writing this type of scene. 

     “As he grabbed her hair and pushed her down on him, her eyes grew wide as silver dollars.”

     “As he grabbed her hair and pulled her down on him, her eyes grew wide with excitement.”

Which of these lines creates the better vision to the reader? To me, everyone knows the size of a silver dollar and though the scene might be titillating, this simple detail reduces the reader’s option to use their imagination. In contrast, her eyes growing wide with excitement allows the readers to interpret how the character looked and thus makes the scene more personal to the reader. Now envision how involved a reader might be if a hundred details form in their mind, rather than on the page. This concept of appealing to the reader’s imagination applies regardless the level of detail. The more your reader employs their imagination, the more personal, more powerful the scene is to them.


I’m also all about the emotion of a scene. Consider a rape. Though the grabbing and thrusting it integral to the incident, if nothing else is described, the scene lacks much of its potential strength. However, if you write about how the woman emotionally responds to these actions, your writing will have much more impact.

To me, detail is dependent upon the scene and the audience. Use more of the reader’s imagination and fewer major details and I think you’ll write with more powerful imagery.

Now for some general tips.

A sex scene, as with all others, should maintain your writing style. Do you include every detail in every scene? Then continue in that vein. Do you skirt the large details for the small? Then carry on with that.


Highlight the tiny details. A man caressing the goose bumps on a woman’s thigh is more enticing than simply thrusting into her.

Think of your book writing more as an Impressionist painting than one from the realistic period.The Impressionists worked with blurs of color and motion, allowing the reader’s mind to see what they wanted to see. The viewer’s imagination filled in the gaps. In contrast, the Realists painted each and every detail, giving each as much power as the next. Though their work is amazing, you only see what they want you to see.

Color-code the emotions you write on the page. Some people use colored pencils or crayons, while others use their word processing text highlighter. It matters not, but here’s how it works. When you mention an emotion such as yearning, you might color it gray. Should you highlight that mood one gets when a couple cuddles after sharing sex, you could use gold.


After colorizing each emotion, make a flip-book of your pages and thumb through them. The colors that jump off the page will offer a strong insight as to the effectiveness of your writing and inform you if you’ve produced the type of article you wished. If your sex scene has a lot of black, for example, let’s hope it’s a rape. If the colors begin with cerulean, turn to yellow, shift to gold then orange and red, then back to blue, you’re probably on the mark for a love scene.


I read somewhere that “Details are the fingerprints of prose.” (Great line, don’t you think?) However, think of your details like spices. Too much salt or pepper and you’ll ruin the taste of the meal. So it is with your writing. Use your details sparingly so as not to overpower your reader.


When incorporating details, insure you employ your characters’, and thus your readers’, five senses. Have your character look at her nakedness, touch her skin and taste her lips. Have him hear her moan and smell her explosion. (And he’d damn well better see she has one.)

The general purpose of your novel is to transport your readers to another place and time. Would they rather go where they wanted or where you tell them. It’s all about the imagination.

It’s not about the sun, it’s about the warmth of the sun on one’s skin.

I do apologize for not offering specific instructions to leave in the erection and omit the sigh, but how much detail to write into a sex scene is up to the writer.


I wish you only best-sellers.

C. Patrick Schulze

Author of the emerging novel, “Born to be Brothers.”

12 Ways an Agents Considers Your Query

I am not an agent, I’ve never had an agent, nor have I ever personally known an agent. Why then, am I the one to write this article? Well, I’m probably not. Still, I’ve been walking this path for a while now and I have learned to use those senses located around my face. This article is what I’ve learned as I’ve traversed my chosen trail.

An agent is in the business of selling books to publishers. They are business people like every other business person out there. They contend with P&L’s, customers, contacts, inventory control, and all the rest. They are looking for authors, even aspiring authors, for without us they are unemployed.

We, the authors clacking away at our keyboards until the dawn lights the morning sky, are their inventory. It is their job and profession to see their inventory put into the hands of their clients, the publishers. The secret, as with any business, is to choose the correct inventory to sell to the correct client. The query letter is one method they use to locate that inventory.

Though not necessarily presented in the order of their thought processes, this is my understanding of when they receive your query, how they look at it.

Is the story within one they can sell? If their contacts weigh heavily toward romance publishers, sending a query touting a nonfiction book on the weaknesses in the Theory of Relativity is wasted on them. They may have no background in selling this type of book and they’ll most likely pass.

If they’ve just sold a similar book, they’ll probably not try to do it again as they’ve already pitched their contacts on the storyline.

If the story within is not interesting, they’ll pass. If this is your storyline is dull, overused, out of date, etc., the agent knows none of their contacts will buy the book from them.

If the story within is not unique, they'll probably pass. If your hero is named Luke and he’s an orphan living on a farm in some far, far away galaxy and he will soon discover he has the power to summon the forces of nature to his aid and… Well, it’s been done. You may have a slight chance if your work has a unique aspect to it, but save yourself the trouble and write a new story.

If your query is not professional in nature, it tells them you are not a professional. These guys are pros, and they want to surround themselves with like-minded individuals. Learn what each agents wishes to receive and give them that.

Their time is valuable and limited. Assuming your query even reaches their desk, you have maybe twenty seconds of their time available to you. If your query starts with, “I am so important to you,” or some such nonsense, you don’t even get the twenty. However, if you start with a good hook that catches their interest, you’ll get the extra ten seconds that previous blowhard squandered.

They look to the quality of your writing. They consider your query a sample of your writing skills and seek those who are well versed in the craft. Why would they try to sell inferior inventory? That is what you are if you have yet to learn how to write.

They do consider your provenance, if you will. Why are you the one to write this work? If you’ve not stepped into a classroom since you quit school in the seventh grade, they will not consider you the best source for recommending how to alter the educational landscape. If you write spy novels but have never seen the thin end of a pair of binoculars, you’ve probably chosen an incorrect genre. Write what you know. No, you need not have a writer’s pedigree, but you do need to exhibit knowledge of your subject matter, be it fiction or nonfiction.

They want to know why you chose them. If you’re querying every agent in the known universe, that’s fine from your perspective, but to them it’s a sure sign of your lack of professionalism. Query them for a reason and tell them why you did.

They do respect the recommendations from within their sphere. Wouldn’t you? They have clients and contacts they trust to know their desires and markets, and a confidant is their most efficient method of finding a new author. Try to get a recommendation. As difficult as that may be, it is your truest path to publication.

They want to know you’re in this as a career. They don’t earn as much money off a single book as they do a number of books. If they have your book published and twenty thousand copies are sold, how man dollars get into their pocket? How much do they earn if they sell twenty of your books at twenty thousand copies per? This is a business for them, even if it is not for you.

This is a subjective business and they will often pass on a manuscript for a reason as simple as it does not “call” to them. Sorry, guys, but life is unfair and so is the publishing world. That is why you query multiple agents.

If your query does not exemplify these qualities, I recommend you keep trying to improve your writing and querying skills.

I’d love for an agent to comment on this as to any errors in my thinking or omission in the list.

Until my next posting, kind readers, may all your books be best-sellers.

C. Patrick Schulze

Strange Dream

I dreamed the first scene of my next manuscript last night.

That is either the start of a disturbing trend or the beginning of a new level of writing in my life.

Personally, I hope the latter...

The Resurrection

Good day, Writers,

We’re almost home with our study of The Hero’s Journey and find ourselves facing The Resurrection, which many think is the uplifting section of a story. Of course, that isn’t true. The Resurrection is one last another opportunity for action and suspense within your story. This part of your novel is the last life-or-death struggle for your hero, yet another confrontation with the evil ones. In fact, it is often the protagonists’ most dangerous meeting with death, or whatever it is he faces.

In many stories, this section takes place just before he returns home. It’s often considered a cleansing or purification to which your hero must submit before returning to his Ordinary World. However, the hero now has an additional arrow in his quiver, so to speak, for he is now armed with the hard-won knowledge gained from earlier encounters. It is here your hero pulls out that new arrow and smites this final aggressor, thus proving his acceptance of The Reward and his worthiness of ownership.

Sometimes the hero is pushed toward The Resurrection or even pulled, but regardless, the enemy has one last attempt to undo your hero, a final exam, if you will. One in which he proves he has learned and can apply the lessons of The Supreme Ordeal.

It is similar to The Supreme Ordeal faced earlier. Often more than just the hero is involved in this ordeal. Maybe his entire village is in danger, for one final challenger arises and he is forced to use the knowledge he gained during his trial to save more than just himself.

To me as a writer, it is one last opportunity to excite your readers when they least expect it.

Although we are using Luke and The Last Hope of the Star Wars saga as our model, I’ve always liked The Resurrection in Under the Tuscan Sun. The heroine does not hear from THE man in her life for a while so she travels to see him. It is in this part of that story where she finds she is not THE woman in his life, but merely A woman. (Talk about a trial!) So what does she do? She marshals all she has learned and falls in love with another man. Great Resurrection, don’t you think?

In Luke’s case, he’s already accomplished his mission of saving Princess Leia, but his final test is defeating the Death Star. In this scene, Luke is attacking in his X-Wing fighter and Obi Wan speaks to him from the afterlife. He tells Luke to, “Trust the Force.” Luke does, thus employing all his learning and experience, and destroys the Death Star and the Emperor to boot.

You see in this scene, Luke has garnered all he has learned, proved himself worthy of The Reward, destroys the REALLY BIG enemy and saves untold thousands in the process. (Explosions of a planetary scale! Now that is a dramatic Resurrection!)

In doing my research for this posting, one person said this was a time of peace and tranquility before he returns to his doorstep. Don’t believe it! This is a time of great, often ultimate, challenges. It’s a wonderful opportunity to again engage your readers and prove your hero worthy. Take advantage of this. You want your readers to be surprised by this and so entwined in your hero’s trial they almost lose heart for him. Use this time to ramp up the intensity of your work and have your readers sweat one last time.

Okay, we again have the bad guys’ defeat and our hero rises even higher in status and proves he is worthy of The Reward. Now, after your reader has caught his breath, you let them relax and feel good about everything. This is accomplished by way of The Return. We’ll get into that next week.

My plan is to finish with these lessons of The Hero’s Journey then outline a couple quick stories showing how to put this entire concept in use. (Wish me luck on that one…)
Until then, my friends, good writing.

C. Patrick Schulze
Author of Born to be Brothers

CPatrickSchulze.blogspot.com
Twitter.com/CPatrickSchulze

Long Road to Success

I've been doing a bit of research on what else it takes to become a successful author, besides writing novels. In my reading I ran across an idea that made perfect sense to me. This concept is to read widely in your genre. Granted, a simple idea, but one that managed to escape me heretofore.

In that vein, I did something today I haven't done in some 40 or more years. I joined the library and actually checked out a book!

Who says you can't teach an old dog new tricks?

The Approach

Good day, Writers,

We’ve traveled quite a way toward our goal of learning how to utilize The Hero’s Journey to craft your manuscript. In this posting, we’re going to see how The Approach plays into your story.

The Approach is the part of your manuscript where your hero prepares whatever it is he must do to come to the entrance of the greatest danger he will face. It is here your hero must ready himself to face his primeval fear. He is about to “disappear” into the Belly of the Beast and must be ready or he will surely die. During The Approach is when he defeats the lesser villains and readies himself for the Big Enchilada!

It ends when he stands on the precipice into which he must descend to locate and take hold of the item of his quest. Classical representations of the end of The Approach, as you might imagine, are the mouth of caves, dungeon doors, and the like. Wherever it is, it’s ominous!

Keep in mind your hero need not approach a place. It can be a mental state or even something as innocuous as a party. It’s simply anything that causes ultimate anguish for your hero. However, your reader must be convinced your hero will surely die. (At least figuratively.) Without this ultimate danger, the next step in your story won’t fly.

The Approach is another interesting part of your novel and may be approached, if you will, from a number of different prospective. Here you can work in some appropriate humor, for example. Have you ever heard of people laughing before battle? It’s just another way to handle one’s nervousness. You might even work in some romance, if you’d like. We’ve all heard the line, “We may not survive!” This is usually spoken by the man as he readies for battle or in another form by a character before the meteor strikes. Regardless, it’s a fun part of writing with endless possibilities.

In our example of Luke in Star Wars, A New Hope, can you envision a scene where Luke was on the precipice of some unholy situation? How about when he and his compatriots fret as the trash masher’s walls close in on them? (Being crushed into goo is, by law, a primeval fear which causes ultimate anguish.) Of course, your hero needs to escape and rescue the princess, as literally happens in A New Hope.

Okay, Writers, if you’ve been following along, your novel is at the point where the world is about to explode. Getting exciting, isn’t it?

My next posting will cover the following step your hero obviously must take – The Supreme Ordeal! (This is gonna’ be fun!)

Till then, good writing.

Patrick

C. Patrick Schulze

Twitter.com/CPatrickSchulze

Author of “Born to be Brothers”